10 Reasons Why I Don't Like Vodka

It was an ordinary day
But there's no other like it
My boyfriend thirsted for OJ
But wanted just to spike it
With vodka. So I begrudingly
Drank up and lost my voice!
And so here are ten reasons, see
It's not my drink of choice:

So here are my top ten reasons on why vodka is not my liquor of choice:

(10) The word Absolut is supposed to have an "e" on the end of it.
(09) It makes me need to pee really badly. And frequently.
(08) It reminds John of puke. Neither he nor I like puke.
(07) "VOD-ka." The name sounds stupid.
(06) You can't make vodka cake or vodka balls.
(05) It tastes like burning.
(04) I'm Jamaican-Chinese. So I'm all about the rum.
(03) The Russians.
(02) It's more expensive than rubbing alcohol and yet it tastes the same.
(01) To an innocent unsuspecting girl in first year, a cup of vodka looks very much the same as a cup of water. However, a mouthful of vodka tastes infinitely worse.