Why I am a jerk

And to a plan I hoped to keep
Attempt to get some decent sleep
And though of engsci I'm bereft
Sometimes it's like I never left

I feel like a tool.

So I complained and complained all of the last week about how work was so busy and how my social life is on the proverbial rocks because I spend every waking minute work. Okay that's a lie. I spend 16 hours a day at work, and 1 to 2 hours commuting. So there is some non work time in which I am driving or sitting on a GO Train. If I'm on the train, there's a good chance my laptop's open in front of me.

But I digress.

I asked my girlfriends if they would please please please make plans with me for Thursday night, grab dinner, chat over coffee, whatever, because I'd be in the office on Thursday and it didn't sound like it'd be a late night.

The plan was to finish at 6:30 pm, and I had a meeting scheduled for 5:30 till 6:30. Knowing what consulting is like, I scheduled to meet them around 8 pm and said I'd give Peggy a call around 7:30.

The meeting didn't start till around 6:45 pm. At 7:30 I was getting antsy to call the girls and tell them I'd be late. At 8 pm, and I couldn't even take a "bathroom break" I was raring to go. At 8:10 pm, I gave up and emailed Ada to ask her to call Peggy and cancel for me. At 8:30 I finally was let go, under the promise to do more work when I got home that night. Called Peggy and Mabel, apologized profusely, and, long story short, didn't go meet them because I had to grab the bus in an hour.

I am so sorry guys.

Which begs the question: if we all know that living is all about the relationships you have with others, family, friends, the pursuit of what makes you happy, about seeing the world, living for yourself...why do we spend so much damn time working? And why does work become an adequate excuse for missing just about anything?

And to top things off, I'm hella tired this morning and dropped my cream cheese bagel on the ground as I was closing the front door. Cream cheese side down. Second time I've dropped my damn bagel this week. Furck.