Oh Peon 2: You suck too

Just when you thought it was safe to come out
And let them roam free without shadows of doubt
They bludgeon you, beat you -- there is no reprieve!
They're dumber and stupider than you could believe!
And so I remain: true, faithful, devout
To the knowledge that I'm with a couple of louts

KEP, CAMBODIA

June 20, 2008

Oh the stories. I've had several requests for Peon stories via email (keep the emails coming, I'm rather enjoying them -- thank you Big Brother, MV, LW for the super long emails) and I was just about to send the Peginator, Emilies and Candle and email about how while Peon 1 has been stirring sh*t up, Peon 2 has been rather tame. And then the fit hit the shan.

Settle in, ladies and gents, it's story time.

First day out in the field was Thursday, and I had Peon 2 come along with me to train him, so that he could eventually be sent out on his own to do interviews while I lie and relax on the beach in my sexy sexy one-piece and work on my farmer's tan.

Digression alert: the famer's tan is unbearable. Here, look at my feet. Ignore the unshaven legs, etc, just take a look at that awful tan! It's from running around my sandals all day.

Although yesterday was worse, because it was super hot and I was (stupidly) running around in my boots thinking that it would rain (it didn't) and my feet were dying of heat stroke. Yeah, so, my feet tans are bad, but because our shoulders have to be covered and neck lines high, I've got a terrible arm and neck tan too. Look horrible. Going to have to work it off on a beach in Vietnam.

But back to the Peon. So we were out in the field on Thursday, and he got a call from the Seaside GH manager, Sam, via Peon's moto driver Puen, that Peon 2 had to return to the GH and clear his stuff out of the room. It was a bit of a debacle: Seaside was booked out for a conference for the weekend and left us with only 4 rooms, so people had to vacate and some had to leave for the weekend. Anyways, this news came a day early, so I let him leave and finished up the day by myself. Unfortunately, it had been raining so Peon 2's cell phone was in my backpack, and he forgot to get it back from me before taking off. I returned to Seaside once the interviews were done, and couldn't find Peon 2. He had missed the previous night's meeting where we sorted out who was staying in Kep for the weekend and would need a room (TH and I lucked out and got to keep our room, but had to store everyone's luggage). He was put in a room with Banana, but I guess the word never got to him. Couldn't find Peon 2 for the rest of the day.

I woke up on Friday and did some work, did some emailing, did some blogging, waiting for Peon 2 to wake up because I wanted to debrief from the previous day's work, and the questionnaire needed some work. He never showed up. Around lunch time Doc V came looking for me to grab lunch with him, but Peon 2 still hadn't shown up. I ran into Banana who said that Peon 2 didn't sleep in their room the previous night. I was worried, especially since if something had happened to Peon 2, he didn't even have a cell phone -- it was with me.

I got Banana to call Kep Lodge to see if Peon 2 had stayed there. Nope, no luck. I went looking for Puen, since he and Peon 2 are pretty tight. Nope, can't find him either. Where is this guy? By now, we're all worried, and we've run out of places to look. Long story short, I went to lunch with Doc V at a local place (FINALLY found some local food -- an all-you-can-eat deal of soup + main dish + tea for 75 cents, plus I had a great iced coffee for another whopping 25 cents) and walked back. I got a call (on Peon 2's phone) from Banana saying that one of the Seaside staff had heard that Peon 2 went to Kampot for the weekend.

The guy just took off for Kampot and didn't tell anyone. Totally shirked his responsibility (I ended up having to go into the field by myself on Saturday, which is fine, only I had wanted to send him by himself for a lone dry run), and my goodness...everyone was worried. Then yesterday (Saturday) while I was out in the field, a couple of people went into Kampot for the day to run some errands, including H. I had been complaining to her the previous night about the whole Peon 2 situation, so she was well apprised, and funny enough, she ran into Peon 2 in Kampot. She lectured him for me. It's like freaking taking care of a child.

By the way, he's my brother Jay's age...and I'm pretty sure Jay, even when driving me nuts, has never been as irresponsible. No wait, between the two of them, Peons 1 and 2, it's like taking care of two fussy, stupid, lazy children!

Hold on to your seats folks, I bet there will be much more.